Thank the devil for letting me be me.

image

I guess in many people’s opinion I am a bad person. I am self centred and I admit to having a big ego. I can be harsh or even cruel if I decide to be. I probably seem to be amoral. I blaspheme, I swear, I drink and smoke and enjoy many other vices. I have sex with both men and women. My sexual tastes can be quite dark, some might say perverse. I like erotica and even some fairly hardcore porn. My girlfriend and I make up our own relationship rules. In life I do sometimes lie and cheat (though, not with my girlfriend). I have no hesitation in taking revenge as and when it serves my purpose. If it suited my needs or purposes there is probably no law I wouldn’t break or sin I wouldn’t commit. So yes, I guess those things make me “bad” in many people’s eyes. Then when you add the fact that I am a fairly open and active Satanist, I run a Satanic coven, I organise and participate in Satanic Rituals and practice what some call black magic; and that I acknowledge Satan as my ultimate archetype, guide and inspiration… Then I guess some would say I have crossed the line between merely being bad and actually being evil.

But it wasn’t always that way. Believe it or not I was a quite sweet and innocent child. Even as a teenager and young adult, while not entirely innocent, I was generally seen as a nice, kind young woman who always meant well (and that probably isn’t a bad description of who I was then). Fortunately the devil was always whispering in my ear; some would say leading me astray, but I would say leading me to self discovery and self awareness.

But it might not have been that way. If Satan hadn’t tempted me off the safer path there are many pleasures I would not have experienced, there are many aspects of my darker self and desires I would never have known. Of course some would argue that would have been better. And that the nicer, more wholesome version of Cassie was a much better person.  I disagree. Knowing myself better than most people do, I’d like to examine what that nicer version of myself might have been.

To be honest it is hard to imagine those little whispers from the devil never being there, they were always the things that gave me the edge and gave me the confidence to be more adventurous. Without them well… I doubt I would have lived and worked abroad before starting my university studies; but it was those experiences that helped me to grow up and learn. There are a lot of people I would never have met. There are a lot of musicians I would never have gone drinking with. So there are a lot of people who are important to me now who would have had no impact on my life.

If I had ignored temptation I would certainly have had less sexual experience with men and I would probably never have even kissed a girl. And if that had been the case I wouldn’t now be living with a woman whom I love and I wouldn’t have a teenage daughter whom I adore. In fact I wouldn’t be living in Zurich and this little corner of love and security would not be part of my life at all.

Without exploring temptation I would probably have played safe with my relationships. I would probably have married and possibly divorced by now. We’d be two basically nice people who wondered what went wrong. Perhaps we’d spend our days trying to do the right things for our kids. I wouldn’t have the job I have now, I would have lacked the predatory instincts to go for the promotions that have brought me success. Besides all the travel I have to do wouldn’t be doable if I had a couple of kids from a broken marriage to look after.

Spiritually I would be lost. My path was always leading somewhere but if I consistently ignored all the signs of where I was supposed to go I would eventually have given up. I’d probably compensate by being over practical and I would hear myself saying things like “Spirituality and philosophy are for young people with too much time on their hands and no responsibility.”

On the other hand I would probably be a “nicer” person, or at least seemed to be. I would alway have been kind. I would always have offered a helping hand to anybody. I would always be a shoulder anybody could lean on. But what would that mean actually? The brutal truth is I would have wasted a lot of time giving sensible advice to people who were never going to take it. I would have claimed to give energy to people when in fact I didn’t have energy to spare. I would often have offered platitudes without really being able to do anything practical to help. I would have tried to help people who didn’t really want or need help. I would have been a victim to every kind of psychic and emotional vampire. And it would never have entered my mind to do anything mean, nasty or vengeful. And the result of all that, I suspect, is that I would have become very depressed and disillusioned.

Satan has certainly given me a much harder edge. An edge that protects me and makes me strong and successful. But the thing which I hope is clear to those who know me best, is that actually I am still a rather kind and caring person; it’s just that my kindness is better directed. In fact without being bound to some of the restraints that many religions and philosophies place on people, I am able to do more for people whom I believe deserve my help and compassion. And in the wider world I am still a political leftist in most things, I still care about social issues and I do what I can to help causes I believe have merit.

Why am I saying all this now. Well, several reasons. Firstly, for personal reasons there are a few people who might be reading this that I want to explain my choices to and perhaps this post will give an insight. Secondly I imagine there may be a few people reading this who may find my experience useful in coming to decisions of their own. But mainly I just want to thank Satan for his patient work with me. Converting to a totally Satanic mindset is the best thing I have ever done. I’m glad I am not the nice but naïve woman I could have become. There is nothing of that more innocent and wholesome Cassie I want back. I like the person Satanism has allowed me to become and the lifestyle I enjoy without guilt or regrets. Some people may think I am bad or even evil. I don’t care. Those concepts no longer have much meaning to me and I think if more people intellectually examined them they might find that such things as bad and evil are ambiguous or relative at best…

I am still on a path. The spiritual journey never ends. There is always much to learn. But I have no doubt of what my chosen path is. I sincerely thank the devil for his continuing guidance and inspiration.

Hail Satan! Hail the real me!

Cassie


7 Comments on “Thank the devil for letting me be me.”

  1. Cassie,

    A truly wonderful post: full of encouragement. Nice work.

    In haste,

    Gerry Chicago

    Sent from my iPhone

    >

  2. Worfil says:

    You have presented an inspirational article which I recommend to all. Satan blesses us with the freedom to live according to our nature. Those of us so blessed can withstand the onslaught of society’s morality and live to be ourselves. For my part I have devoted my life to Satan and have accepted the indulgence He has offered me.
    Seems Satan is only identified as the gender of each devotee. In my case I am primarily homosexual though I have also lived in part the conventional life – a further blessing from Satan.
    All blessings to you Cassie and thank you.
    Ave Satanas!

  3. Aleph says:

    You know, I completely believe you when you say Satan gives you a harder edge. It seems to go with the territory for Satanism and for many other Left Hand Path traditions (which sometimes gets exaggerated in more extreme traditions). Perhaps it also tends to come with the notion of a rugged individualism that I’d say is espoused by Satanism.

  4. Cassie & Sophie says:

    Reblogged this on Cassie & Sophie NSFW.

  5. Robert... says:

    Aloha Spooky Babe’s,

    I wish you all nothing but a “Calming Breeze”…

    You are more than welcome – Not to post this “reply”. *I realize that this is a Blog Forum, and is for the benefit of all… but I don’t really care about your fan base (not trying to be rude).

    “Thank The Devil For Letting Me Be Me.”:
    As a guarded Solitary, I rarely “surface”. However, this article was too stimulating to resist (*thank you for sharing)!

    My early life as a “non Satanist” is the extreme opposite than yours… yet the outcome, effects, and benefits of a Satanic Lifestyle is almost exact. *Please permit me to explain…

    I obviously won’t share the explicit details… sure you ladies will “get it”. *Many years ago (22+), I was part of an “income generating network” that provided a temporary product of Pleasure… to those who could afford it.

    Power (a false sense), Major Coin ($$$$), Crazy Experience’s, Kink Erotica (countless beautiful women)… were the main perks. *Unfortunately, when you “shine”… others (violent thugs etc.) will attempt to take your treasures.

    Living that existence (11 years), truly makes one “aware” of the Evil Side of almost everything. *Thick skin, ruthless / twisted thinking… were needed to protect myself, family, and close bro’s.

    When I successfully “retired” (was never exposed), I was still Programmed to be “alert”, of everything / everyone around me. *To this day, I still can’t Mentally stop certain strategic regimens, that protected me back then (wish I could).

    SATAN TO THE RESCUE: About 13 years ago, I pursued Satanism. *At that time, I had family members, who were dedicated Jehovah Witnesses (no longer). Observing them as “weak slaves”… I wanted the extreme opposite.

    As with some, I researched and applied myself to the “words” of the Satanic Bible. *Unfortunately, it was just a “bandage” of satisfaction.

    It didn’t make sense to have a Modern / Atheistic approach toward Satanism, when I was experiencing “in real time” events directly with Satan (amazing).

    I then began to focus on Spiritual Satanism (non religious). *Works by Diane Vera, Venus Satanas, and several others… truly resonated with me!

    I’m proud to call myself an Eclectic Spiritual Satanist Scorpio. As mentioned, I was the opposite of your upbringing and experiences. *In my case… Satan has guided me to “tone down”, my previous insights.

    Ethic’s… Strong Moral Compass… Respect, Kindness & Love (to the deserving)… Enforced Evil (toward the punks of the world). *This is who I’ve become.

    For many years now – I’m a CEO of a company, who volunteers at the local food bank. *If a simpleton were to “meet me”… they would have no idea, what lurks behind my charming smile.

    You mention that Satan, has given you a harder edge… he gave me a softer one. *HAIL SATAN!

    “Dark Art Choices”:
    Stepping-back to this post… I have several Art Photo’s of Lilith (powerful, slightly erotic, tasteful), that you may appreciate. *If your interested in seeing them (“no worries”, if not), please provide a way for me to email attachment’s (JPEG or ZIP).

    I’ve had this “Lilith” music video (my perception), for many years now. The lyrics, somewhat defines part of her demeanor. *Enjoy…

    Best Regards,
    Robert \m/

    • Cassie & Sophie says:

      Hi Robert. Thanks for your comments. Sounds like you have a colourful biography! You have some interesting perspective too. One thing I think your post highlights when combined with what I wrote is something that people outside Satanic circles find very difficult to understand, and that is that despite its permissiveness Satanism very much requires and promotes a kind of balance.
      One thing you seem to have in common with our family is that while we tend very much towards the rational, scientific and generally atheistic view of the world we cannot deny the reality of Satan. Indeed we are influenced by the same people you mention.
      I can see the Lilith elements in the video you linked to and I like the Sneaker Pimps anyway. Actually I find a lot of perceptive LHP sentiment in a lot of alternative and indie music.
      If you would like to share Lilith or LHP artwork with us it might be best to do so through my Tumblr site; Satanic Muse (Cassie Wren)
      Best Wishes, Cassie

  6. Robert... says:

    Aloha Spooky Babe’s,

    I wish you all nothing but a “Calming Breeze”…

    You are more than welcome – Not to post this “reply”. *I realize that this is a Blog Forum, and is for the benefit of all… but I don’t really care about your fan base (not trying to be rude).

    “Thank The Devil For Letting Me Be Me.”:
    As a guarded Solitary, I rarely “surface”. However, this article was too stimulating to resist (*thank you for sharing)!

    My early life as a “non Satanist” is the extreme opposite than yours… yet the outcome, effects, and benefits of a Satanic Lifestyle is almost exact. *Please permit me to explain…

    I obviously won’t share the explicit details… sure you ladies will “get it”. *Many years ago (22+), I was part of an “income generating network” that provided a temporary product of Pleasure… to those who could afford it.

    Power (a false sense), Major Coin ($$$$), Crazy Experience’s, Kink Erotica (countless beautiful women)… were the main perks. *Unfortunately, when you “shine”… others (violent thugs etc.) will attempt to take your treasures.

    Living that existence (11 years), truly makes one “aware” of the Evil Side of almost everything. *Thick skin, ruthless / twisted thinking… were needed to protect myself, family, and close bro’s.

    When I successfully “retired” (was never exposed), I was still Programmed to be “alert”, of everything / everyone around me. *To this day, I still can’t Mentally stop certain strategic regimens, that protected me back then (wish I could).

    SATAN TO THE RESCUE: About 13 years ago, I pursued Satanism. *At that time, I had family members, who were dedicated Jehovah Witnesses (no longer). Observing them as “weak slaves”… I wanted the extreme opposite.

    As with some, I researched and applied myself to the “words” of the Satanic Bible. *Unfortunately, it was just a “bandage” of satisfaction.

    It didn’t make sense to have a Modern / Atheistic approach toward Satanism, when I was experiencing “in real time” events directly with Satan (amazing).

    I then began to focus on Spiritual Satanism (non religious). *Works by Diane Vera, Venus Satanas, and several others… truly resonated with me!
    I’m proud to call myself an Eclectic Spiritual Satanist Scorpio. As mentioned, I was the opposite of your upbringing and experiences. *In my case… Satan has guided me to “tone down”, my previous insights.

    Ethic’s… Strong Moral Compass… Respect, Kindness & Love (to the deserving)… Enforced Evil (toward the punks of the world). *This is who I’ve become.

    For many years now – I’m a CEO of a company, who volunteers at the local food bank. If a simpleton were to “meet me”… they would have no idea, as to what lurks behind my charming smile.

    You mention that Satan, has given you a harder edge… he gave me a softer one. *HAIL SATAN!

    “Dark Art Choices”:
    Stepping-back to this post… I have several Art Photo’s of Lilith (powerful, slightly erotic, tasteful), that you may appreciate. *If your interested in seeing them (“no worries”, if not), please provide a way for me to email attachment’s (JPEG or ZIP).

    I’ve had this “Lilith” music video (my perception), for many years now. The lyrics, somewhat defines part of her demeanor. *Enjoy… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P6zsdZfaxMk&feature=related

    Best Regards,
    Robert \m/


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